We have a common desktop computer at home that everyone in the family uses. One weekend, my sister’s phone had malfunctioned and she used the desktop to browse the internet. She thought she was clever enough to clear her browsing history, even though there wasn’t anything particularly inappropriate about what she was watching. But she was unaware about ‘cookies’. Thanks to websites like Google and Facebook tracking your internet usage to give you customised advertisements or suggestions based on your interests, which none of us are safe from, Mother dearest was shown some new ads the next time she went online.

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Turns out my sister was watching some ‘YouTubers’ that make funny videos and sketches about gender identity. Perhaps she found the topic interesting and went around doing casual searches about queer culture, scrolling through online stores that sell things like breast-binders, simply to understand this community. Instantly, the entire browser was filled with ads for some of these products linked to Amazon and search suggestions related to the content she was viewing. Confronted by our mother, she was forced to feel guilty and her internet viewing became increasingly monitored. She limited my sister’s smartphone time and excessively password protected the family computer.

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My sister used to access social media secretly through my phone or laptop at times but after I graduated high school last year, I wasn’t home often and barely got to communicate with her or help her out. It seems to be becoming more and more commonplace for parents in this era to hyperactively control their children’s online activity. They would have friends and support as well as easily accessible information on the internet that has now been stolen from them. This kind of unnecessary invasion makes it really difficult for a lot of kids to reach out for help or to talk about any problem with their parents, who have pushed away their children in exchange for their privacy.